April 19 – Internet search update
I woke up this morning with a very sore throat and a fever. This doesn’t bode well. Colonel is coming this evening. Hopefully, I’ll feel better as the day goes on.
I checked Alt.com a few minutes ago. There are some truly peculiar people contacting me. As of this morning, I have had 203 total contacts, 41 who sent personal messages, 17 who added me to their hotlists, 38 who winked. I don’t know if this is a normal amount for a month or less than normal. What I do know is that with a very few exceptions, none of them have been particularly promising and many have been downright repulsive.
The most surprising contact this week was from an apparent woman who lists herself as a trans-sexual transvestite. She lives outside my travel zone but wants to meet me anyway. She sounded quite pleasant. Since I’m not bisexual, I’m not interested. Her message made it clear that she is interested in a sexual encounter, but I suppose if she were only interested in spanking, her gender would be unimportant. So, if any of you are looking for an asexual spanking partner, then you might want to eliminate a gender preference.
If not for the Colonel
To be truthful, if I had not met Colonel so quickly, I would be a bit discouraged at this point. On the other hand, I would have been more proactive and might have arranged a meeting with two or three of the closer contacts who seem not exactly what I want, but are still possibilities. The development of the relationship with Colonel has given me the freedom to be much more particular with whom I correspond. It is also making me less interested in the personals sites. My membership doesn’t come up for renewal until mid-June. If things are continuing to progress satisfactorily with Colonel, it is unlikely that I’ll pay the cost of a renewal.
I have also enjoyed and continue to enjoy my conversations with Baxter. So two out of 203. That’s exactly what Doc told me to expect. One out of 100. Doc’s a smart fellow. That seems frustrating, but so is not being spanked. Friends, if you are just starting a search of your own, please keep these figures in mind and don’t let it get you down. I happened to meet my 2 out of 203 very early in the game. That is probably unusual and it may take you longer. But I am proof that it’s possible not only to find a spanking partner, but to find one who is a decent, caring human being in the bargain. The only certainty is that you won’t find a spanking partner if you don’t try.
April 20 – Detour
By the time Colonel arrived yesterday evening, I was feeling dreadful. I should have called him and asked him not to come. We had dinner then watched another DVD. I had a coughing fit which prompted him to order me to take some cold medicine and go to bed. I rummaged in the medicine cabinet and couldn’t find what I wanted, so he made a trip to the pharmacy near my house to buy what I needed. What a dear he is turning out to be. He tucked me in, said good night to my critters and went home. Two spankless encounters in a row. He said he’d check with me tomorrow and we’d go out one evening this week.
April 27 – Communication is everything
I was sick all week. Colonel was planning to take me to dinner on Thursday, but I just wasn’t up to it. So we put our next meeting off until last night. The evening turned out to be a mixed bag.
On the positive side, he used my restraints during our session. He had shied away from them for the last spanking, so I wondered if he didn’t like the type I have or if he didn’t like bondage as much as his profile indicated. So, I took a deep breath and e-mailed him about it on Friday. The bottom line is that he wants to provide the sort of experience I desire, but I have to tell him what that is. I have to communicate better folks. We are just developing this relationship and both need to be up front about what we need to get from it in order for it to be satisfying. So my tip for the day is to talk about things with your spanking partner. Let him or her know what you want.
Another positive thing is that my toy basket is getting fuller. I got three new implements this week from Leather Thorn. Two paddles and a strap. It won’t be long before I’ll need a larger basket.
The bad thing is that I still wasn’t completely over this cold. So please try to imagine me having to grab a tissue every few minutes. It isn’t a pretty image. There I was, bare butt over his lap, staring at the carpet with my nose so stuffed up I could barely breathe, interrupting him to reach for the box of tissues and blow my nose.
After the hand spanking, which was wonderful and produced a red stinging bottom, he put me over pillows as usual and then tied my wrists and ankles securely to the bed. That is such a sexy feeling. The increased vulnerability genuinely adds to the experience for me. He began by using my new strap. It feels exactly like being spanked with a heavy belt. Then he switched to a leather ruler paddle, the tawse, the riding crop and back to the strap. As always, he rubbed my bottom between implements. And this time he also had to get a tissue and hold it to my nose and tell me to blow. Second tip for the day. Don’t let someone tie you up when your nose is drippy. Oh, and he was making plans for dinner this week while he was strapping me. Asking me which restaurant I’d like and which evening. Chattering away and never missing a beat. I think we decided on Tuesday. But it might have been Wednesday. Sorry, but I was rather distracted since I was having my ass whipped at the time. I’m sure there’s a comedy movie in there somewhere. It was a moderate spanking. He took it easy on my because of my cold. And because he was tired of having to help me blow my nose. Told me I was a bloody nuisance. There’s no soreness or bruises this morning at all. He promised to try out the new paddles next week.
April 29 – Perfect experience
Perfect is one of those words bandied about so much that it’s real meaning is often lost. We read about perfect gentlemen, perfect jobs, a perfectly illustrated discussion point, the perfect wine, etc. I recently bought the perfect pair of shoes to wear with a new suit. Perfection is possible, I suppose. But when dealing with human relationships and experiences, I have yet to encounter one. I certainly wish all of you the perfect spanking partner and the perfect spanking, but don’t be surprised when it doesn’t happen.
Colonel and I are getting along extremely well and our spanking sessions have been satisfying. But they haven’t been perfect. The last one included a drippy nose, for example. It also included the revelation that the angle he has to use, slightly bent forward to reach me when I’m piled over pillows in the middle of my bed, makes his back hurt. It’s ironic, since the reason he chose that position is to keep my back from hurting. I’ve had a bad back for years. So my project this week is to find a solution.
We both like spanking in the bedroom and don’t particularly want to move to a different room. For one thing, our spankings are erotic in nature. We spank because both of us find it sexually arousing. So the bedroom is the logical location. Plus, it just seems more private and intimate. It’s also convenient. All the toys are there, a bathroom is attached so things like lotions, towels, etc. are just a step away. We need to stay in the bedroom.
Except for the flogger, birch and the riding crop, all of the implements he has used so far could be used otk. So one idea is to have him sit in the middle of the bed with his back resting against the headboard and use only those implements suitable for the otk position. But that still leaves the problem of what to do when he does want to use other implements. I love my flogger, enjoy the crop and actually look forward to the next session with the birch. And he hasn’t started with the canes yet, something that will eventually be included.
Those of you who have read the accounts of Doc’s spankings will remember that he uses a wedge-shaped cushion on which to place his bottoms and raise their backsides into proper striking position. Sarah sent a link showing the kind of cushion Doc uses and he kindly supplied the dimensions. I have an old wedge cushion used years ago for a medical condition, but it is too small. It is only 7 inches high. I need one at least 11 inches. I searched the net and located a reasonably priced one that is a bit smaller in width than Doc’s but is 12 inches high. So I have ordered it. I hope the extra height will help Colonel reach me more easily. Besides being higher that the pillows we’ve been using, it will be firmer and won’t scrunch down as bad.
It will take a while, but eventually we will learn enough about each other’s needs and desires to know how to properly structure our sessions to give the maximum amount of pleasure to both of us. We may never have the absolutely perfect spanking, but it is more likely if Colonel can get through it without a backache.
May 4 – Patience is a virtue
Colonel and I spent most of the day yesterday together doing a wide variety of normal, vanilla things. Knowing there would be a spanking at bedtime made me a bit impatient. I look forward to my spankings.
The wedge arrived on the second, but we decided to try resting his back against the headboard. He found this much more comfortable than sitting on the edge of the bed for my otk. He had selected his implements du jour before getting into position. I stretched across his lap. This was more comfortable for me as well. He started as always with his hand and spanked, with stops for rubbing, for about ten minutes. The implements he had taken from the toy basket were the leather strap, the new Brat Paddle from Leather Thorn and the five-fingered tawse.
He began with the tawse. This is becoming a pattern. He likes to begin with it because it produces quite a burn and reddens my bottom quickly. It is light weight and therefore doesn’t cause a lot of deep tissue damage. It’s effect is shallow, and although it leaves marks when used, they fade rather quickly. But it does hurt like the devil. He switched to the paddle and then finished with the strap. I was beginning to complain toward the end was struggling to hold position.
Colonel is gradually increasing the intensity of my spankings. He is letting me get accustomed to them again. Part of me is craving a bit more, but I know it is coming and trust him to bring me along at the proper pace. Today my bottom has that achy, tight feeling and is quite tender in places, but there aren’t any bruises. It seems that my bottom is already toughening up again. In the old days I seldom bruised unless I was caned or was spanked on the tops of my thighs. That is why the bruising after the first two spankings from Colonel disturbed me. Red bottoms are pretty and sexy. Bruised ones aren’t. At least not to me and fortunately not to Colonel.
This points out again that even though we all share a desire to give or receive a spanking, we don’t all have the same motivation or wish for the same outcome. My interest in spanking is erotic. Someone who spanks as discipline might very well consider a seriously bruised bottom a desirable outcome. It’s a different mindset. It also points out that the top and bottom need to be on the same wavelength. I want to be spanked because it turns me on. Colonel likes to spank me because it turns him on. It’s a good match.
Epilogue – February 2017
I posted this diary in 2009.
I recently wrote Mary Catherine to ask how she’s doing. She reports that she has retired, is enjoying life, and that Colonel still spanks her on a regular basis.
She is happy.